Time To Set the Record Straight: Part 1
by BARBARA HARTWELL
I find it necessary to address some issues, in regard to
information about myself and my case as well as my dealings with certain people
who have also gone public with their testimony, research and viewpoints
regarding mind control, gov't black ops and related topics.
My main
concern is that there is a lot of misinformation and disinformation out there -
both on the Internet and floating around as rumour.
You've read it on
the Internet? Heard it on a radio show? Heard it from someone who claims to be a
close associate of mine or a
purported "insider"? It ain't necessarily so.
So before things get too far out of control, it's time for me to set the
record straight. In light of the rapidly worsening circumstances of my life,
designed by the perps to drive me further into the downward spiral of illness
and poverty which has become an ever-more-serious threat to my life, as well as
the escalating sabotage of all my attempts to disseminate my own material, I
need to clarify the truth about as many of these issues as I can --while there
is yet time.
God willing, there will be.
I won't be able to cover it
all in the length allowed by this report -not by a long shot. Just consider this
the first of a series of reports. My intent is only to tell the truth as I know
it, to correct misinformation, to refute false allegations, erroneous
suppositions or
theories which I have seen published or which have come back
to me as rumours through the grapevine. Any opinions expressed here are solely
my own; and I do not presume to speak for anyone but myself.
But since
it's my life that's the issue, and my reputation that's at stake, it's important
that to the best of my ability, I let the truth be known. As for the facts I
present here, they should also speak for themselves.
FACTUAL
DATA
I was born on March 12, 1951 on Manhattan Island in NYC. (March
13,
Universal or 'Zulu' Time) I am indeed 50 years of age, despite the
opinions expressed by those who insist that I "could not be old enough" to have
the extensive history which I claim as my own. It seems these folks are judging
by the photos of me posted on my website. Those photos were all taken between
1997-2000. I can't help it if I look younger than I am; but I'm tired of my
appearance compromising my credibility.
I AM a survivor of the following
gov't black operations: CIA MK ULTRA;
Phoenix Project - colloquially known as
Montauk- and otherwise known as 'Rainbow'; and of other 'deep black' CIA
sponsored or related operations which for now shall remain nameless.
I
was never involved in the project known as 'Monarch', that being
publicized
by Mark Phillips and others.
I was never victimized/utilized as a
so-called 'sex slave' or 'presidential model' as many people seem to have
falsely assumed --erroneously supposing that my experiences have been similar to
those being publicized by Cathy O'Brien; Susan Ford aka Brice Taylor and others
in this milieu.
I am not a survivor of Satanic Ritual Abuse.
I am
not a survivor of pedophilia, child pornography or incest.
I broke out of
CIA black ops and related mind control programming
not suddenly, or all at
once - but finally and irrevocably in 1994- after a years-long battle with my
handlers - and started to go public in 1996.
I have not been
'deprogrammed' by any formal methodolgy or with the help of any professional
'deprogrammer'. I broke the mind control programming through many years of
prayer and with God's help.
SOME BACKGROUND INFO
There's not
enough space to include all the details here, but only an overview.
My
professional background, education, training and credentials are mainly in the
areas of metaphysics/ parapsychology/spiritual disciplines. I was ordained and
licensed as a minister in the Universalist Church in 1979, and specialized in
spiritual/pastoral counselling, but I have not practiced as a minister in many
years and am no longer affiliated with any church or organized religion.
I am trained in the Jungian/Transpersonal method of psychotherapy and
'psychological' astrology. I am a certified hypnotherapist
and my work as a
Jungian-method astrologer, psychotherapist and lecturer on these subjects has
been endorsed by the Carl Jung Society in NYC and Westport, CT as well as
numerous other educational institutes.
I lectured and taught classes on
metaphysics and spiritual disciplines for over 20 years at various institutes.
During this time frame, I also worked as a professional clairvoyant. In
practicing these various disciplines my work included private counselling for
individuals and families; investigative work on cases for legal firms and DA's
offices, some of which were international in scope; personnel counselling and
consulting for corporate entities.
CIA 'fronts' and proprietaries
(including some of these corporations
and legal firms) regularly contracted
my services.
I was considered a professional CIA asset and utilized in
various capacities as such for many years.
My "cover" was that I was
working as an "independent contractor" or
"talent". On the 'outside' I
appeared to be 'self-employed', which though legitimate, does not describe the
complex nature of my situation. In actuality, I functioned as a deep cover
operative, acting partially - though not totally - under programmed
controls.
I have also worked as an investigative journalist in both
electronic and print media for over 20 years. From 1987-1995 I hosted/produced
radio and TV programs in Connecticut, on WGCH radio, Greenwich, CT and
Cablevision of CT, Norwalk, while residing in Greenwich, CT.
The topics
I addressed on these programs were related mostly to the
spiritual/paranormal/metaphysical; UFO research; gov't corruption and
conspiracies; human and animal rights, and political activism.
My
training as 'on-camera talent' and in TV production was sponsored by a CIA front
company which also funded my TV programs and paid me a monthly stipend for
various consulting services.
I had been trained and groomed by CIA (
among other things ) as a 'media representative' (read propagandist) for the
'New Age' and New World Order.
I will address these issues in more detail
in an upcoming article : CIA Propaganda Ministry: The New Age and New World
Order.
During the 1980s, I served as a press representative and
investigator for Amnesty International.
From 1986 to the present I have
conducted extensive research on UFOs and related phenomena, both as a field
investigator and an investigative journalist. While hosting/producing my radio
and TV programs I interviewed many of the most well-known UFO researchers and
'abductees' ; 'contactees' ; 'experiencers' as they variously described
themselves.
Between 1994 and 1997 I conducted an intensive investigation
in Pine Bush, NY and surrounding areas, including nearby West Point. My
investigation mainly focussed on covert gov't/military black ops being run out
of this and other areas, some of which I had been personally utilized in while
still under programmed control.
For many years I led what I can only
describe as a 'double life',
or even more strange, a 'multiple life'. And by
that I don't mean
'multiple personality disorder'.
Due to the
utterly bizarre nature of the so-called 'paranormal' aspects of the projects in
whihc I was was utilized, such as Phoenix/Montauk - which can only be
characterized as 'deep black' ops - some of my experiences defy description. I
realize the extreme difficulty of gathering solid evidence, not only to
substantiate my own experiences and involvement - but for the very existence of
the operations.
When you are dealing with hyper-space, multi dimensonal
and interdimensional planes of existence and the like, it can be next to
impossible to nail down the absolute truth, much less prove it.
I am well
aware that speaking about the stranger-than-fiction aspects
of my
experiences, and what I KNOW-but cannot prove- to be true
has been a major
stumbling block as regards my credibility.
Therefore, I have tried to stick
as much as possible to the more mundane aspects of the operations, though my
frustration in not being able to do justice to the 'real truth' often gets the
better of me.
What I find most important is to expose the massive
violations of
human rights which are instrumental in the black operations
and
mind control programs in which I and others were victimized.
I
consider myself a champion of individual rights; a defender of the constitution;
an advocate for the oppressed. Before such violations can be stopped - the
ultimate goal - they must be exposed.
I chose to go public about my own
involvement in black ops for these purposes. As a whistleblower, I can offer my
own testimony. As an investigative journalist I can publicize cases of other
victims/survivors/targeted individuals.
And as someone who has been
involved in human rights activism for
over 30 years - my first arrest for
civil disobedience was in 1969 -
I continue to do all in my power to put a
stop to the abuses which
I have witnessed and experienced.
I am not
now - nor have I ever been- affiliated with any group or
organization for
survivors of mind control or other forms of abuse. I currently workas an
independent researcher and journalist.
Since I have been blacklisted
from the mainstream media due to my whistleblower status, I publish my own
material on my website and in my newsletter, the Hartwell Intelligence Report.
I intend to start serializing on the Internet the material
intended
for my book, so that in the event I don't live long enough to finish
the book, at least I will have put out as much material as possible which can
later be edited by others into an anthology or comprehensive volume.
RE
MY PROFESSIONAL ASSOCIATIONS AND RELATIONSHIPS
TED GUNDERSON, FBI Senior
Special-Agent-in-Charge, Bureau Chief Los Angeles,CA, ret. I first met Ted in
1997 when he and I were both speakers at the Global Sciences Congress in Denver,
Colorado. I subsequently developed a friendship and professional association
with Ted. Ted conducted an investigation of my case between 1997 and 2000.
During that time, I spent many hours in phone conversations and meetings
with Ted, which took place at various locations around the U.S. I also spoke
publicly with him in radio and TV interviews and shared the same podium in
lectures and seminars.
Any rumours that I was romantically involved with
Ted are false; there was a close friendship and professional relationship
but
nothing more. Also false are rumours that Ted was ever my 'handler'
,
'programmer' or 'deprogrammer'.
In January 2000, I had a serious
disagreement with Ted which created a
conflict of interests and led to my
decision to break off my professional association with him. The major point of
contention concerned Ted's allegations -in conjunction with those of Susan Ford
aka Brice Taylor- that Kurt Billings was a 'CIA plant'.
I told Ted that
based on my own interactions with Kurt, I strongly
disagreed that Kurt was a
'plant'. I asked Ted and Sue to furnish
evidence for this allegation, but no
evidence whatsoever was forthcoming, only their personal opinions.
Speculative hearsay was also relayed by other associates of Ted and Sue
whose 'bona fides' and credibility I considered dubious at best. I told Ted at
that time that I was unwilling to take part in what I could only see as a
slander campaign for the purpose of discrediting Kurt, a colleague whom I also
considered a friend, and still do.
As a result of these (IMO, false)
allegations, which were being disseminated by Sue and Ted, and which may have
compromised Kurt's reputation, I subsequently wrote a public testimonial in
Kurt's defense, because I believed -and still do- that Kurt's reputation and
character were being unjustly defamed. Kurt did not ask me to write anything on
his behalf; it was my decision based on what I deemed to be the ethically
correct thing to do.
I will not offer a lengthy opinion here as to the
reasons why Sue Ford and Ted Gunderson claimed to believe Kurt to be a 'plant'.
I
will only say that from Sue's perspective, I believe it had to do with
Kurt's unwillingness to follow along with what he
considered Sue's
ill-advised ideas regarding what was best for her daughter Kelly, who has been
seriously damaged as a result of extreme abuses dating from her early childhood.
Kurt is a Christian minister, a 20 -year researcher of mind control and has
worked with mind control victims, and in this capacity Sue had asked Kurt to see
if he might be able to help Kelly.
But Kurt clearly stated to Sue after
observing Kelly's seriously debilitated physical and mental condition that he
was simply not qualified in the capacity of a psychiatric/ mental health
professional to work with Kelly and that the type of help Kelly needed could not
possibly be provided by him. As for myself, I can understand Kurt's position.
There is much more to this story, which it is not my place to publicly tell; and
also because I must honor confidences that were shared with me. But I have no
reason to believe Kurt to be a 'CIA plant' ; and in fact many good reasons to
disbelieve it, having been in a position to observe certain situations and to
hear both sides of the controversy.
So let's set this one to rest: I do
not believe Kurt Billings to be a "CIA plant" nor have I ever been part of a
campaign to discredit
Kurt, publicly nor privately. And while we're on the
subject, one more
thing: any rumours that Kurt was ever my 'handler' or
'programmer' are also false and are based purely on speculation from uninformed
sources and/or have been planted as purposeful disinformation in an attempt to
discredit myself and Kurt.
A number of people subsequently contacted me
claiming to have information about Ted Gunderson.Some claimed they had "inside
info" re Ted. I listened with an open mind to what all of them had to say. All I
was ever interested in was finding the truth. Some of the people whose testimony
I heard regarding Ted -both pro and con- are people I respect; others are people
for whom -with good reason- I have no respect.
I cannot speak for any of
these people, nor can I prove or disprove their allegations. But I don't form my
own opinions based on anyone else's good or bad experiences, especially if there
is no hard evidence to substantiate their testimony. And I refuse to be a part
of spreading public slander about anyone, including Ted. All I can go by are my
own personal experiences with any individual along with facts and evidence I am
able to establish.
Although my disagreement with Ted was a source of
great sadness;
caused me considerable stress; and prompted much
soul-searching
on my part, in all fairness to Ted I must say that he never
treated me
personally with anything but kindness, respect and concern for
my
well-being. I will also say that he never refused to help me when I was in
need of it and that there were times when his help and advice were instrumental
in saving my life. Ted never took any money from me; in fact he repeatedly spent
his own money in connection with my case.
In the spring of 2000,
journalists from NewsMakingNews published
the Ted Gunderson Data Dump.
http://www.newsmakingnews.com/gunderson.htm
Included in the 'dump' was
"Gunderson Delves Even More Deeply Into Mind Control: The Case of Barbara
Hartwell ". This link to my case on the site was NOT placed there by my request
nor with my permission; but I am aware that since the security letter I wrote,
dated Oct. 13, 1999, which contained my testimony - some of it in reference to
Ted - had already been published on several sites on the Internet, it was not a
breach of my legal rights by the journalists from NewsMakingNews. They offered
to publish an article written by me re my dealings with Ted; but in the context
of the 'data dump' which is decidedly anti-Ted, I decided that it would not have
served any good purpose.
RE THE LINDA WIEGAND CASE: In October/November
1997 I was asked by Ted
Gunderson to assist him in his investigation of the
Linda Wiegand case.
My involvement was as a journalist, helping to get
publicity for the case through my media contacts in Connecticut and in helping
to
re-write and edit a legal case summary. (I am not an attorney but
have
sufficient legal training to write briefs and am fluent in 'legalese'.
)
To my knowledge, Ted received no compensation for working on the
case.
Donations from Linda Wiegand's supporters payed only travel
expenses,
accomodations, etc. Ted did not even have a car, and for a few days
I let him use one I had borrowed from a friend and later arranged for him to be
driven around by one of my associates who lived in the area.
At that time
Linda was living in an apartment in Connecticut.
I will not go into all
the details I learned about the case. Information is available elsewhere from
many sources, promoting various conflicting viewpoints. All I will say is that
from MY OWN observations and analysis - which PRECEDED Ted later publicly
denouncing the Wiegand case as bogus - my opinion was that Linda was in
collusion with federal authorities for the purpose of 'setting up' and
discrediting certain people in the Christian/Patriot community, including Ted
and Bo Gritz, among other agendas.
While working with Ted and Linda, it
was clear to me that Ted really
believed in the veracity of Linda's case and
sincerely wanted to help -for all the right reasons. But I did not approve of
the way Linda treated Ted - ordering him around as if he were a servant, and
snapping at him if he didn't move fast enough to do everything she wanted, which
I witnessed repeatedly. She showed little appreciation for Ted's help,
especially considering the fact that he wasn't being paid.
Although I was
horrified by Linda's tale of the satanic and sexual abuse of her children, I saw
something in Linda's eyes which I can only describe as a coldness, which did not
seem in keeping with the trauma and heartbreak one would expect to be displayed
in the countenance of a mother whose children were being so brutally abused.
I honestly can't claim to know the absolute truth of the situation and I
don't claim to have x-ray vision regarding other people's feelings or motives. I
am only giving my observations, for what they're worth - and they may be worth
nothing.
As a professional psychic for over 20 years, I had worked on
many legal cases and my intuitive feeling from the beginning -in this particular
case- was: 'Something is wrong with this picture'.
I also got the feeling
that Linda regarded me with suspicion, and didn't trust me. She seemed
uncomfortable and somewhat defensive when I was asking detailed questions in
order to establish facts and a timeline for events relating to the case so that
I could write an accurate case summary.
Anyway, when Ted finally had to
leave Connecticut because no more money was available to pay his expenses, I
decided not to continue working on the case with Linda, as Ted asked me to do,
because by that time I knew it was in my own best interests to leave. And the
arrest of Bo Gritz for 'kidnapping'Linda's children at the school further
confirmed my feeling that all was not as it seemed; and certainly not as it was
being presented by Linda.
My last discussion with Ted re the Wiegand case
was two years later, in November 1999, and we established at that time that we
were in agreement that Wiegand was a gov't plant being used for a sub rosa
agenda.
In summary, since I've known Ted, he and I have agreed about a
number of things and disagreed about others. I enjoyed working with him. Ted
never attempted to exert undue influence over me and even when we
disagreed or when I declined to take his advice, he well knew I
wasn't
the type to be strongarmed by anyone. Sometimes he thought I was
stubborn because I refused to defer to his advice and insisted on fighting my
own battles, unlike some of the other survivors he was used to working with, who
seemed to regard Ted as someone who had all the solutions to their problems.
Although I was - and still am - grateful for his support, I never viewed Ted in
this way and he knew it.
But sadly, some of my disagreements with Ted -
his allegations re Kurt Billings as well as his continued unconditional
endorsement of the testimony and activities of Susan Ford, which I considered
-by association- a liability to myself and others- created a conflict of
interests and that is the reason I no longer have a professional association
with Ted, though I care no less about him as a friend and still consider him as
such.
SUSAN FORD AKA BRICE TAYLOR
I first met Sue Ford in 1997 at
the same conference where I met Ted
Gunderson. I developed a friendship with
Sue and over roughly a
3 year period, I had spoken publicly with Sue on a
number of occasions, in radio and TV interviews and on the lecture
circuit.
In January 2000, I finally broke off contact with Sue for a
number of
reasons. As previously mentioned, I could not in good conscience
support what I considered Sue's unfair treatment of Kurt Billings,
nor
share her viewpoint that he is a "CIA plant". But this particular disagreement
between Sue and myself was only one of the reasons for my decision not to
continue a professional or personal association with her. Frankly, I found her
overall treatment of me to be inappropriate and unacceptable.
For one
thing, Sue repeatedly overstepped her bounds by trying to tell me what issues I
should -and should not- be addressing in public.Among the issues which she did
NOT think I should be speaking about were my involvement in 'deep black'
operations such as Phoenix/Montauk; the 'paranormal' aspects of these projects
as well as my extensive research in connection to UFOs and related phenomena.
She told me that the public was "not ready to hear or believe" these things and
that speaking about them could only serve
to discredit me and other mind
control survivors -including herself- if I added them to the mix in speaking
about my own experiences of mind control.
I strongly disagreed with Sue
and bluntly told her so. In my experience, the audiences I had addressed,
whether on radio and TV or -as a guest or interviewer- and in my seminars and
lectures - over a 20 year period of public speaking- were very open-minded about
these topics and wanted to know more. More significant is the fact that since
these 'deep black'projects constituted the bulk of my own experiences and are
the primary area of my expertise, NOT speaking about them would have placed me
under severe limitations. NOT telling the whole truth -at least what I know of
it- would only have muddied the waters and compromised my credibility even
more.
More importantly, I do not allow anyone to tell me what issues I
should - and should not - be addressing, since that is my prerogative and since
I speak only for myself, based on my own experiences and research, and never as
a member or representative of any group. I do not join groups, pure and simple,
since I refuse to toe anybody's party line or adopt or promote consensus
opinions - about mind control or anything else.I also refuse to allow anyone to
practice "containment" strategies on me. It's been tried many times, by various
agents and minions of the US gov't - and has always
failed. As far as I could
see, this 'containment' of my testimony
- and the larger issues it involved-
was part of the larger agenda - an agenda certainly not designed by Sue Ford,
since she was clearly not the one calling the shots.
Sue also repeatedly
tried to persuade me that I should stay in the
background and let her have
the "lion's share" of time in public
appearances, lectures and media
interviews where we were both invited
to present.
I often didn't
have much choice in the matter. Somehow or other it was always 'arranged' for
Sue to take the lion's share of alloted time -whether I agreed to it or not-
using it to promote her specific viewpoints and 'party-line' position.
Since I have no desire to compete with anyone, nor to become anyone's
satellite or sidekick, I realized that I was better off not making
public appearances with Sue, whose background and experiences had little
commonality with my own. And whose viewpoints and agenda appeared to have been
determined by someone else. A 'someone' who was not operating out of a love of
truth, freedom and justice.
But I later learned that Sue had also been
telling people, including
professional colleagues and conference promoters
-behind my back- that she thought I should NOT be speaking AT ALL in public
about mind control since I had never been formally "deprogrammed" by the methods
Sue and some of her associates endorse, foremost among them the
EEG
bio-feedback method which Sue has been promoting and practicing for the past
several years.
Unfortunately this meddling and spreading of
disinformation by Sue and some of her cronies caused me to lose speaking
engagements
because I was not invited back - or else "blacklisted" even
before
I had the opportunity to speak at certain conferences where the
promoters had in fact been considering me as aspeaker.
It is true
that I have never been formally 'deprogrammed'. This has been by my own choice,
since I have always been very careful as to whom I allowed to mess with my
psyche --considering the fact
that the CIA programmers and handlers had
already made quite a mess
of it !-- and I had never found anyone I trusted
enough whom I also
considered qualified AND who was willing to work with me.
Since I could not afford to pay for such services, the field of my options was
woefully narrow: I can only compare it to trying to discern how many angels can
fit on the head of a pin.
There were several people who offered their
services as 'deprogrammers' gratis- after I had already broken out of the
program- including Sue Ford herself, via the EEG biofeedback method, but I
declined, forwhat by now should be obvious reasons. I sure didn't have any
desire to be 're-programmed' . No thank you, No Ma'am !
As I tell
everyone who asks: I broke mind control programming by many years of prayer and
by the grace of God. And what I choose to speak about publicly is my own
business - not the business of some self-styled ad hoc comitteee of people who
bill themselves as "experts" on mind control or 'deprogramming'. I do not claim
to be an expert on mind control. I speak only about my own experiences and
research. And
I understand that my own experiences have little in common
with most of the other mind control survivors I have ever met; read about or
heard about.
I also experienced other problems with Sue. In 1999 Sue
produced her own videotape, Mind Control Goes Public, mostly featuring herself
in interviews and lectures. Also included in this tape is a TV interview
featuring Sue Ford; FBI agent Ted Gunderson, retired ; ex-CIA agent Chip Tatum,
and yours truly, Barbara Hartwell.
The moderator is journalist Ryan
Elliott of Chicago Health Television, who interviewed the four of us after we
gave a seminar at Global Sciences Congress in Daytona Beach, Fla. titled Insider
Secrets of Gov't Corruption. To my knowledge, the original interview was never
aired on the TV station because there may have been intimidation tactics used
against the journalists/producers. The issues we addressed in this interview
were of a very sensitive nature: CIA assassinations; drug running; black ops,
mind control, etc.
However, a 'bootleg' copy of this interview was
simultaneously taped by Jon Gentry, a videographer who often worked with Ted.
The first I heard of the existence of this tape was when a man e-mailed me to
say he had seen me on the tape, which he had purchased from Sue Ford. I later
learned that Sue had made copies of the 'bootleg' tape, incorporated it into
Mind Control Goes Public and started selling them like hotcakes via mail order
and on the Internet. Sue never even told me she had made the tape. Worse, Sue
never shared with me any of the money from sales. I had never signed a release
for anyone to use the taped interview on which I appeared: EXCEPT Chicago Health
Television.
Currently, this tape is being sold like crazy all over the
Internet: not only by Sue Ford but also by Amazon.com; by David Icke; by Mark
Phillips; by Jon Gentry and God knows how many others.
Apparently
there are now also other versions of the tape for sale -on which I appear- not
only in the Ryan Elliott interview, but in portions of my pblic talks, pirated
by the various producers and vendors of these tapes. I have NOT EVEN SEEN hese
new versions. That's because ironically, I can't afford to buy them. Meanwhile,
these people -including Jon Gentry and Sue Ford- have sold thousands of copies
and are raking in the bucks. And I have never received a penny from ay of those
people who exploited the fruits of my labor and - to this day- continue
tocollect the profits.
But to add insult to injury, as Sue and others
well know, I am dirt poor - a result of the perps' machinations of my finances
not been able to aford to produce my OWN tapes, even using my OWN materials.
If that's not exploitation, I don't know what is !
I started my
Legal Defense and Research Fund in 1997, in an attempt to raise money so that I
could survive long enough to continue my research, with the goal of exposing CIA
black ops in which I was involved, and to eventually file a class action lawsuit
against CIA for damages in connection with violations of human and
constitutional rights perpetrated against myself, certain family members and
others.
Sue told me that she thought it would be more beneficial to us
both if she and I worked TOGETHER on fund raising, instead of me working alone
through my Legal Defense and Research Fund. I - in hindsight, foolishly- agreed
to this proposal, as Sue assured me she had adequate financial resources and had
made plans with a lawyer to legally incorporate a fund-raising organization. Sue
promised me that she and I would "split the funding" so that we could each use
our respective shares to pursue various avenues of endeavor.
I waited for
Sue's plan to materialize, since I had no resources
at all and could barely
pay the rent to keep a roof over my head. But I waited in vain. I was later told
by Sue that she had decided to work on this project with someone else's
organization in Canada instead of working with me, in association with my Legal
Defense and Research Fund. And then, a short time later, I found out, in a phone
conversation with Ted Gunderson -who assumed I had already been invited to
participate- that Sue had arranged for a meeting in Los Angeles, for various
activists, mind control survivors and therapists, to raise money on a large
scale for the purpose of exposing mind control and providing legal and 'mental
health/deprogramming' services for victims/survivors. A meeting - as I told Ted-
to which Sue apparently considered me unworthy to be invited.
In a
lecture at Global Sciences Congress, 1998, Sue Ford made a statement which I
-and many others- found extremely disturbing: "Anyone who claims that they did
NOT abuse their own children is NOT a real survivor."
When Sue issued
this proclamation, I was sitting in the front row and when I heard this, I felt
like I had been punched in the stomach. I also have it on videotape (the
aforementioned Mind Control Goes Public ) and every time I hear Sue's words, it
feels the same. As I and many other "real survivors" know, the measure of a
"real survivor" is NOT whether they did -or did not- abuse their own children !
I can state categorically that I NEVER abused my children. I know this, and so
do my children. There are many types of
"survivors", and we all have had our
own tragic experiences. But to make such a blanket statement - which is patently
false- only serves to cast aspersions on those of us who did NOT abuse our
children. It also serves to provide cover for the abusers - whether those
abusers are 'mind control survivors' or not- with the idea: They couldn't help
it, they were under mind control !
It is not that I don't have compassion
for Sue or for others who were
involved in intergenerational child abuse in
connection to mind control. But it is just NOT TRUE that EVERYONE who was EVER
under ANY kind of mind control was involved in child abuse -as a victim and/or
an abuser. And no matter how great my compassion, it does not mean I am willing
to be lumped into a category where I do not belong and to be falsely accused of
something I have not done.
But there is another problem here: What about
those people who are just waking up to the possibility that they MAY have been
under mind control ?
For these people, hearing such a blanket statement
-and not knowing better than to believe it- can effectively serve to keep them
from being motivated to explore the possibility that they may have been under
some form of programming. Because the very IDEA that they may "remember" having
abused their own children -sexually or otherwise- may well be too much to bear.
So for the benefit of any such people: I implore you, don't believe everything
you
hear, just because one person who claims to be an expert on mind control
says it's so. I repeat: IT AIN'T NECESSARILY SO !
In February 2000, when
I had finally reached the limits of my endurance, I wrote a letter to Sue Ford,
confronting her with all the ways in which I felt she had treated me
exploitively, manipulatively and unethically. I was very direct -as is my way-
but not unkind. I reminded her that I had always tried to help her in any way I
could and that I had loved her like a sister; but that I could no longer
continue a professional association with her, since under the circumstances it
was not in my best interests to do so. I told her that I was more than willing
to discuss the issues; explained that I truly did care about her and that I
hoped she would see fit to make an effort to resolve things with me.
But
Sue just sidestepped my attempt to confront her. She never acknowledged any of
the issues I brought up in my letter. All I got back from Sue was a brief
personal e-mail with an attached long 'form letter' addressed to
"Friends-in-the-Know". This letter mostly consisted of details about her
daughter's case and more allegations against Kurt Billings, described again as a
"CIA plant" and whom she apparently was blaming for a multitude of her problems
as well as her own shortcomings as a mother.
In her short personal reply
to me she also tried to blame Kurt for the rift between her and myself. But the
fact of the matter is: I had not even KNOWN Kurt for most of the time I was
involved with Sue. And there was no excuse for Sue to make a scapegoat of Kurt.
Like myself, all Kurt ever did was try to help her, at HER request. And like
myself, he refused to be manipulated or to do whatever Sue wanted on her own
terms, at the expense of violating his own principles.
I will now refer
to an article by Katherine Sullivan, titled The Latest Adventures of Mark
Phillips, published in Conspiracy Planet.
Katherine mentions that Sue/Brice
repeatedly claimed that directives
issued by "Jesus" were behind requests she
made of Katherine; in such cases where Brice was attempting to influence
Katherine in one way or another. Katherine gives an example: Brice claimed that
"Jesus" told her that the two of them should confront Mark Phillips at a
conference in Atlanta about his lies and his exploitation of Brice, Katherine
and others. But then, in contradiction of this, Brice told Katherine at the last
minute that "Jesus" apparently changed his mind
and said that it was "not the
right time" for her -Brice- to confront Mark Phillips, leaving Katherine to face
the situation alone.
I don't doubt the veracity of Katherine's statements
regarding her
experiences with Brice/Sue; not only because I believe
Katherine to be an honest person but also because similar advice claimed to
issue from "Jesus" was also relayed to ME by Sue/Brice on a number of occasions.
Sue told me that "Jesus" had been talking to her about me and that he advised
her about what I "should be doing". C
Coincidentally, it just so happened
that the opinions of "Jesus"
were in perfect alignment with Sue's own ideas
and agenda --none of which could have benefitted me in the slightest. As I told
Sue, I have access to my own spiritual guidance which I have been able to rely
on for many years. And in any case, the way I see it, if I want advice from
Jesus, I can always ask him myself.
Although I had discussed some of
these issues with Katherine and we did seem to agree regarding a number of
things, including about the M.O. being used by Brice Taylor/Sue Ford, we had
also disagreed about several other issues.
Katherine and I certainly
never reached any such definitive agreement about Ted Gunderson. I do know that
Katherine considers
Ted one of the "cadre of bad guys" along with Mark
Phillips, Walter Bowart, David Icke, as she describes them in her article. (And
BTW: I do NOTdisagree that Phillips, Bowart and Icke fit in that
category,
for my own reasons. ) Thus, my concern is that Katherine includes a comment
about me in her article which is misleading and which does not accurately
describe my viewoint, nor the true nature of my situation.
Katherine
writes: "If the puppet victims are openly promoted by the cadre of bad guys
working together behind the scenes with support nobody else can get, and if
those survivors who do break away suddenly lose their support and are hounded
mercilessly (like Barbara Hartwell when she started to wake up about Ted
Gunderson ) how can we circumvent their crap and find a safe and clean way to
get the information out? "
As regards this statement, it's important for
me to correct and to clarify some things in relation to myself. Although I have
discussed
Ted with Katherine, I did so privately -not as a discussion meant
to become a public issue-and I never indicated to her that I had reached the
conclusion that Ted was one of the 'bad guys '. In fact, I repeatedly made it
clear that Ted had always treated me well, and that despite the negative
opinions certain other survivors -including Katherine- had about Ted, I was not
about to let myself be unduely influenced by these opinions.
By the time
I met Ted, I was far removed from the point where anyone -bad guys or whomever-
could exert undue influence on me, no matter how desperate or life-threatening
my circumstances became. It had been tried many times: The CIA tried to
re-recruit me by offering me money; protection; publicity - on their terms, of
course. My answer was always the same : No deal.
More importantly, I
never believed -nor did I tell anyone, including Katherine- that the harassment
being directed at me had anything to do my connection to Ted Gunderson. First of
all, as mentioned previously, I finally broke out of CIA black ops in 1994,
after many years of battling with my handlers. The "merciless hounding" which
Katherine describes has certainly been a fact of my life. But the persecution I
have been subjected to - which continues to this day - started LONG BEFORE I
ever met Ted Gunderson and in fact did not begin with my decision to break off
my professional association with him.
Rather, the extreme harassment had
do with my refusal to cooperate with my handlers and my refusal to allow the CIA
to get returns of their considerable investment in me -both financially and
otherwise- an investment which began in my early childhood. I was targeted for
'neutralization' starting in 1994, when the perps deemed me a
threat to
'national security' --in reality a threat to their nefarious agenda-- because
they know I am willing to do whatever it takes to expose and stop their massive
violations of human rights, even if that means I have to pay for it with my
life.
Although Katherine's statement about me is merely a parenthetical
"example",it seems to be placed there as if to illustrate or be emblematic of,
her thesis that 'puppet victims' who break away from their handlers are punished
by being divested of support and the endorsement of those same "recycled
handlers and programmers". For all I know, that may have been true in some
cases, including the people she mentions by name in her article, such as Cathy
O'Brien and Brice Taylor. But I have no way of knowing that for sure and do not
wish to publicly engage in such speculation. However, speaking strictly for
myself and about my particular case, I need to make it clear that Katherine's
opinion regarding me is only that - an opinion- and does not stem from any
factual information, nor from
any viewpoints I have ever expressed to
Katherine nor to anyone else.
I respect Katherine, consider her a good
friend and know her well
enough to say that I am sure she meant no
disrespect to me. It is clear to me that she was only stating her opinions and
that her intent was honorable. But I also need to make it clear that Katherine
and I see some things very differently. As Katherine describes her own
experiences in her published writings, they are similar in some ways to those of
Cathy O'Brien and Sue Ford, whereas mine were very simply...NOT. I also have
never been involved in any waywith the other men she describes as being among
the "cadre of bad guys" and
"recycled handlers and programmers"-- Mark
Phillips, David Icke, or Walter Bowart. To date, I have not publicly revealed
who my handlers and programmers were and will not do so until I have something
resembling solid evidence, and unless I feel it would serve a good purpose. But
I will say that none of the people Katherine mentions in her article -including
Ted Gunderson- were among them.
I hope that this report has answered some
questions. I hope that it has corrected some misinformation and cleared some of
the muddy
waters of disinformation. I hope that it has called into question
some inaccurate theories and refuted some false allegations. At the very least,
I hope that in speaking FOR MYSELF I have made my own position clear.
Whatever.... I've done my best. After all, it's my life. And you've heard it
here -from the horse's mouth.
In closing, please consider these
words:
"By honors, medals, titles no true man [woman] is elated. To
realize
that which we are, this is the honor for which we are
created"....Angelus Silesius
"Nothing has such power to broaden the mind
as the ability to investigate systematically and truly all that comes under thy
observation in life. "....Marcus Aurelius
"Whoso would be a man [woman]
would also be a nonconformist"....Ralph Waldo Emerson
"The words of truth
are always paradoxical"...Lao Tzu
Barbara Hartwell
Legal Defense and
Research Fund
PO Box 832
Woodstock NY 12498
websites:
http://www.ulster.net/~babs7/
http://www.homestead.com/barbarahartwellsurvivor/
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